The Elusive Sasquatch

Growing up, I was always fascinated with Bigfoot or Sasquatch stories. I stayed up late at night watching the Sasquatch specials, determined that I would grow up and be the person to prove its / it’s existence. It became my lifes / life’s mission to move to the Pacific Northwest, where most Sasquatch sightings are reported and hunt down this mysterious beast. I did not want to hurt it, just prove it existed. I was so tired of all those self-important scientists / scientists’ making fun of people who had reported seeing Sasquatch. I knew I had to prove them wrong. After all, scientists / scientists’ knowledge changes all the time. I mean, is red wine good for us or not? But, I digress.

At the young age of twenty, I made the big move to the Seattle area, and as soon as I could, I was out of town, in the woods, and on my quest. It did not take long for me to discover evidence of Sasquatch. I saw footprints, clearly bipedal, that led to some kind of crude, small hut. I knew it must be a Sasquatch’s / Sasquatchs’ hut, but there was no sign of anything around. I continued my journey. Deeper into the forest, I came upon some kind of hoard of wild berries—blueberries, raspberries, and blackberries. I remembered reading that wild berries were some of Sasquatchs / Sasquatch’s favorite foods. However, there were so many berries, I was convinced I had, indeed, found the hoard of several Sasquatches / Sasquatches’. I decided to wait near the berries and hide. The Sasquatches / Sasquatches’ hunger pains would surely drive them back to their hoard soon. But, it seems like I was more tired than the Sasquatches were hungry, and I accidentally fell asleep.

I awoke to the sound of rustling and munching. I thought I might have even heard the sound of bowl’s / bowls clanking. I wondered how it might be that the Sasquatches were using bowls, but I then thought that one never knows just how intelligent these creatures might be. I got my camera ready. I was terrified, but I knew my only chance for evidence was to jump out and take a picture using the element of surprise. I steadied my nerves, turned on the cameras / camera’s flash, adjusted the settings, and jumped out from behind the tree ready to take the picture that would change the world. I did get a great picture, but it was no Sasquatch. It was just some forest-dwelling, reality television guy making a film—and some berry jam. My story turned out fine in the end, though. I got some great jam, which gave me enough energy to continue my quest. Just keep watching the news. I will have that Sasquatch evidence soon!